A Little Caregiver Humor

Nancy Dunn Thompson of www.mmlearn.org shared these Caregiver sayings with her FaceBook friends.  Many thanks to her for allowing me to share them with you.

1. Your new hobby is canceling credit cards, writing letters to collection agencies and canceling numerous magazine subscriptions.
2. You spend 1/3 of vacation time backtracking as you look for eyeglasses, purse, hat, gloves and sweaters.
3. You place most of the bills in a folder labeled, “I will think about this tomorrow.”
4. Going out to eat is a Big Mac or a Whooper.
5. An outing consists of going to get the mail.
6. You lobby your Congressional Rep. to have more hours added to the clock.
7. Taking care of yourself means…?
8. Coffee, cola, and aspirin are food groups.
9. You never sort your loved ones socks because they seem to like to wear them mismatched.
10. Your lawn has been declared a wildlife refuge.
11. The living area of the home is somewhat tidy, but your own bedroom is a disaster.
12. Going to church depends on if you can find someone to stay with your loved one for a couple of hours.
13. You *might* get the luxury of a long hot bath once a month (maybe) unless you take it at midnight. And even then it’s iffy.
14. Stopping at the pharmacy counts as “me time”.
15. You know the pharmacy phone number by heart, but can’t remember where you put your gloves.

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Lighter Side of Caregiving

These are just a few things that I find humorous in my life as a caregiver.  Some of them were not funny at the time, but they are now.  Gladys doesn’t remember my name, she calls me Nichole (my daughter’s name).

Three years ago when we downsized, Fred and I moved to a new community of town homes.  Most of our neighbors are young professionals.  Every day I see them walking their cute little babies and their dogs.  One group walking with a baby carriage, one group walking with a leash and then you have me and Fred walking our old lady in a wheelchair.

You know you’re a caregiver when you’re out and about and Depends fall out of your purse.  Can you spell embarrassing?

My younger daughter Anita, keeps Gladys on Sundays.  Before it became a problem to bring Gladys to church, Anita took her to church one Sunday but forgot the seat to her wheel chair.  The ushers tell me it was quite a site to see Anita walking with Gladys holding on for dear life.  She got her inside to the first chair she could find.

Anita comes over occasionally on Saturdays to give me a break.  Gladys can be quiet and content all day long but as soon as Anita leaves she hollers NICHOLE.

Gladys and my husband, Fred, have a disagreement at least one a week about her orthopedic shoes.  I asked her why does she keep fussing about those shoes and she said, “those are old lady shoes.”  I said, you’re 82 years old. You are an old lady.”

Gladys can’t remember what I told her five minutes ago but she won’t go out of the house without her chewing gum.

I’ve known Gladys all of my life (literally) but she doesn’t remember my name.  She never met Stevie Wonder but she remembers his name.

Gladys will fuss if she thinks we have her stand too long, but she will stop dead in her tracks and wait until the cat decides to get up and out of her path to the bathroom.

On Saturday mornings I get up about six o’clock, go downstairs very quietly, turn on the big screen tv just loud enough to hear.  I turn on Turner Classic Movies and watch old movies until about 11:00.  As long as Gladys doesn’t hear anyone, we don’t hear a peep out of her.  But as soon as she hears the slightest movement – NICHOLE! Did I mention she has bionic hearing?

I think laughter is great medicine for keeping your sanity.  Sometimes my sense of humor is a little off-beat, but it keeps me from becoming bitter or depressed, I can find humor in almost anything.

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This Old Lady Is Wearing Me Out!

Just thought I’d have a little fun with this picture.  It is not me, it’s my daughter, Anita.  She came by yesterday to give me a break from 3:30 until 8:30.  I was able to watch Oprah, eat dinner and take a nap without responding to NICHOLE!  I appreciate the break, every little bit helps keep me sane and keeps me from becoming resentful.  Anita also prepared Gladys’ dinner, took it to her and got her ready for bed.  Oh, and she fed the cat – not this cat, Gladys’ cat.

Ahhh,  my own small moments of leisure.  I’ve learned to appreciate the small things in life.  A few hours of time when I can do some things for myself, or do nothing at all.  Priceless!

Gladys didn’t really wear Anita out.  Anita’s eyes were itching and she put on my gel mask to help relieve the itching.  But, I had to capture this photo because it is so indicative of how I often feel – worn out.

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