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Archive for the ‘Life Changes’ Category:
Dementia: What’s my name?
After about ten days we made an unexpected discovery. Gladys knows who I am but she does not know my name. We made this discovery while Nikki and I were watching tv and Gladys needed help with something so she called Nikki. Nikki looked at me and said, “There are three people in the house, why does she keep calling me?” After I gave it some thought, it occured to me that Gladys did not know my name.
Of course, Nikki didn’t believe me. She said that up until they left Philadelphia, Gladys kept asking “When are we going to Valerie’s house?” I told her that Gladys might have said it then, but I was certain that she couldn’t remember my name. So I checked and sure enough, she didn’t know my name, Fred’s or Anita’s name. She knows who we are but not our names.
Is this a temporary memory issue caused by so many recent changes? Is this the normal progression of dementia? If any of you have experienced anything similar with someone in your family, I sure would appreciate your feedback.
Caregiving: Wheel Chairs, Handicap Parking, Baby Monitors
The first week Gladys was here, I spent time learning routine care giver’s tasks: how to assemble and disassemble her wheel chair, how handicap parking works and why those lined spaces are next to the handicap parking space. I also developed a love-hate relationship with baby monitors.
Most of the time Gladys uses a walker, but when we go to the store or to church, she uses a wheel chair. In addition to learning to assemble, disassemble and lift the chair into the trunk of the car, I had to learn how to help Gladys into and out of the wheel chair; and how to transfer her from the wheel chair and into the car. It’s not difficult, but it takes time and patience.
I used to look at handicap parking spaces and wonder why those extra lined spaces were next to the parking space. I thought they just took up extra space that could accommodate another car. Now I understand that the extra space is there to accommodate a wheel chair or walker. Who knew, obviously, I didn’t.
The baby monitor is a whole different story. It doesn’t have anything to do with anyone else but me. Our house does not have an intercom system, so we use a baby monitor to make sure Gladys is ok. That’s where the love-hate relationship comes in. I love it because I sleep on the third floor of our townhouse and Gladys sleeps on the first floor. With the baby monitor I can tell what’s going on downstairs.
However, I can also hear a fly that is hovering over the baby monitor, Gladys snoring, the tv that was left on and everything else. Until I was able to differentiate the sounds, I was running up and down the stairs all night long. That’s where the hate part came in. But I’m learning and it’s all good.
Caregivers’ Legal Stuff: Bank Accounts, Pension, Social Security
One of the first things we needed to do was establish a new bank account for Gladys and transfer her pension and social security to a bank in Georgia. I actually started the process before Nikki and Gladys left Philadelphia but even though I have Gladys’ Power of Attorney, we couldn’t finish the process until Gladys arrived.
Because Georgia and Florida seem to have lots of scams and fraud involving the elderly, the bank requires physical verification of the identify of the person and have them sign some paperwork. So when Gladys got here we went to the bank a few days later and completed the process with the bank.
The staff at Washington Mutual Bank did a wonderful job of making Gladys feel comfortable and like she had been a long time valued customer. Gladys signed the paperwork and then we ordered new checks and finished all of the little details for banking.
We also had to take forms for the bank to fill out verify that they had met Gladys and that she had opened an account there. These forms were to have her pension checks sent to Georgia. The last bit of paperwork is for Social Security. That one is still in process. I have no idea how long it will take.
